Recently a fifteen year old, who aspires to play college hockey, emailed me the following question.
How important is networking within the hockey community, and how can I start building connections?
Some players my age market themselves with social media, I do not have a phone.
Her question applies to many up-and-comers, whether they’re players, coaches or folks who’ll end up working outside of hockey.
There are two aspects to consider when it comes to using social media to network and advance one’s life.
On the one hand, social media is a powerful, positive tool because it’s a scalable way to communicate. Whether you have an audience of 7 people, 700 people or 7 million people, you can reach them with the same effort. People across the world can see your work even while you’re sleeping. I’ve gotten multiple jobs in hockey because the hiring manager liked what they saw on my Twitter feed.
On the other, social media becomes a curse when the chase for clout starts crowding out the most important things in life. I learned in adulthood that it takes a tremendous amount of energy to maintain interpersonal relationships. When you have a demanding career, you don’t have a ton of time to invest in others, so you’ll absolutely need to:
Pick the right people to welcome into your inner circle
Actively nurture those relationships for mutual benefit
Social media is not so good for either purpose.
When I was a teenager in the MySpace/early Facebook era, I thought getting ahead meant breadth: How many virtual friends I had, how many parties I was invited to and how many people came to mine. As I got older I found that depth of relationship mattered far more: being present for old friends, taking care of my parents; starting a family. I can count the truly important people in my life with both hands. I’m happy prioritizing these 10 people over tens of thousands online. I still enjoy meeting and interacting with new people, but if one of them per year turns into a personal friend or business partner, that’s a lot!
In conclusion, before trying to recruit another million followers, think about whether you can achieve your aim by just making one new connection. Or maybe what you need is a heart-to-heart with someone you’ve known for years.